Orihime was a broken girl who despite her harsh life always smiled and hoped for the
better. Her whole family was killed and was reduced to being a
plaything of man called Mara luckily she was not a sex slave but a slave nothing less.
The man Mara happened to be the Dictator of the Japanese Empire who's
had family had taken over all of East Asia from Mongolia to Thailand. Mara treated her
like a lesser being she was often humiliated for nothing other than Mara
got sick pleasure from her suffering.
"Things will get better, I just know they will" she often thought.
Ichigo was a soldier of a Japanese father and a Chinese mother. He was often picked on
for that fact that he was not purely Japanese rather than his orange
hair. His only friends were Uryu Ishida who was also born of a Japanese father and a
Chinese mother. Tatsuki Ariswia who a girl who Ichigo spared with and
"Chad" although his real name was Christian Jesus Rivera a son of a U.S. Navy Seal who
was assigned to protect the U.S. Ambassador. Fortunately for Ichigo
he was of the Kurosaki family and his father was a high ranked government official. This
enabled Ichigo to join the Japanese Army at fifteen and rise through the
ranks. Despite this Ichigo was still unhappy with his life for he felt nothing he did
would ever make him feel any worth.
If that was not enough soon his mother died after his nineteenth birthday which caused
him to be more cynical than before. Two years passed and soon Ichigo
became a cold and unfeeling robot. He no longer cared what he did anymore and just did
his duty putting down rebellions and killing without regrets. Mara
congratulated him and held party in his honor.
"So what think of the party?" Mara asked.
"I personally don't care" Ichigo replied.
Mara grinned and soon made a toast to Ichigo. He soon presented a girl dressed in rags
with beautiful gray eyes and auburn hair. She gave Ichigo a sad smile
and suddenly for the first time in two years he smiled.
"Here's a gift for your loyalty Ichigo Kurosaki my former slave and don't worry she's a
virgin because it much more fun to see her tortured than to have my way with her. However
in all the years I tortured her I not once seen her cry which is no fun for me" He said
smugly.
That night he felt also for the first time anger how could the man he gave his life for
treat a girl that way. Is this what he did his duty for to see this man torture people
for sick pleasure?
"I'm sorry I must be going for have some paper work to do."
"Then by all means Ichigo go but don't forget your gift"
Ichigo than slowly walked towards her and said "Don't worry I will not treat you the way
Mara did". With that they both left the party for he now knew what he had to do for both
her and the people Mara had sent him to kill.
So the idea behind this story is very interesting, I can tell you that. I think that, to improve this story, you should replace some words and use others that impact more, if you get what I mean. The website www.wordhippo.com should help a lot in that area. And you might want to have more comma usage in this story.
Other than that, I really like it.
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